Men and women often have different perspectives on intimacy, shaping how they navigate challenges in their relationships and it has been observed that men typically associate intimacy with physical connection and shared activities, while women prioritise emotional connection and understanding. This variance can lead to misunderstandings and dissatisfaction in sexual relationships.
In an interview with HT Lifestyle, Khushboo Bist, Sex Educator, insisted that understanding these differences is crucial in developing effective strategies to reignite intimacy and address sexual satisfaction challenges. She said, “For men, intimacy often revolves around physical closeness, including gestures like holding hands, hugging and kissing, as well as sexual intimacy and shared activities. On the other hand, women seek emotional connection through meaningful conversations, crying, sharing feelings and being emotionally present for each other. Bridging this gap requires open communication and a willingness to understand and respect each other’s preferences and needs.”
To reconnect sexually, Khushboo Bist suggested couples can adopt various strategies like –
1. Be open about imperfections: Acknowledge that neither you nor your partner is perfect, and that’s okay. Embrace each other’s flaws and work together to make the best of what you have.
2. Maintain a sex positive mindset: Approach sexuality with positivity and openness. Embrace your desires and explore them with your partner without shame or judgment.
3. Open communication: Foster a safe and non-judgmental environment where both partners can openly express their desires, concerns, and boundaries. Understanding each other’s preferences is essential for enhancing sexual satisfaction.
4. Share fantasies: Encourage each other to share fantasies and desires openly. Discussing fantasies can ignite passion and create excitement in the relationship.
5. Explore together: Don’t just talk about fantasies, explore them together. Engage in activities or role-play scenarios that fulfil each other’s desires and fantasies, creating new experiences and strengthening the bond.
6. Embrace playfulness and silliness: Incorporate silliness and humour into your relationship. Laughter and playfulness can lighten the mood, reduce stress, and enhance pleasure in sexual intimacy.
7. Practice emotional intimacy: Focus on small gestures of affection and emotional connection in daily interactions. Expressing love and appreciation through acts of kindness and empathy strengthens emotional bonds.
8. Discuss sex positions: Have open conversations about sex positions and try new ones in the bedroom. Exploring different positions can enhance pleasure and satisfaction for both partners.
9. Maintain distance: It’s essential not to be together all the time. Creating space and maintaining individuality can make the relationship more exciting and passionate. Thus, absence can surely make intimacy grow.
10. Seek professional help: Consider seeking couples therapy or marriage counseling. It helps. A qualified therapist can provide guidance, facilitate communication, and offer insights to overcome challenges and strengthen the relationship.
By putting these strategies into practice and actively investing in their relationship, couples can overcome sexual satisfaction challenges, rekindle intimacy and cultivate a relationship that is more fulfilling and harmonious. Dr Rohan Palshetkar, Head of Unit Bloom IVF and Professor at Dept of OBGy in DY Patil School of Medicine, echoed that sexual satisfaction is a cornerstone of every healthy relationship yet there is no guarantee of sexual satisfaction and it can even lead to relationship decline over time. According to him, here are some things couples can do to overcome it –
- Have a conversation with your partner about how you’re feeling. Discuss with them your likes and dislikes. If you’re not comfortable then consider having a counselling session to discuss your and your partner’s needs. Couples sex therapy can be beneficial in understanding each other’s’ needs.
- Some partners may not achieve an orgasm through intercourse alone. Increase the amount of foreplay. If your female partner is unable to achieve an orgasm through intercourse, help achieve it prior to intercourse. This may increase her satisfaction.
- Try scheduling a date night once a week to bring up the romance. Make sure it is device free and this can help both of you to get more intimate and ensure good frequency.
- Last but not least don’t forget self-care. Eat healthy, get plenty of sleep and keep some “me time” to unwind. Stress can lead to sexual dissatisfaction and can cause problems in bed.